Friggin Possessed Treadmill

I was Googling a treadmill picture and found this instead:

The treadmill is indeed possessed.

This just goes to show you should never pick up strange treadmills on the side of the road. It might try to kill you.

I had my suspicions when I first got it. It seemed like I was running faster and faster but the little red screen just said 3.4.

I mean, I thought 3.4 was a walk for me, but here I was, running at full tilt, about to fly off the end of the treadmill. I thought I was getting so old and out of shape that 3.4 was a full out run.

Geez, I must be shuffling when I walk. Somebody go get me a walker please!

Then it started continuously taking the pulse of some invisible entity that was definitely not me.

This threw me off a bit, but I still wasn't sure if it was going too fast or I was just really out of shape.

Two days ago, I had hit 2.2 miles, huffing and puffing and feeling like I was going to fly off the end, when it suddenly slowed down to the point I was about to trip over the front. I mean really slowed down to less than a walk.

At this point, there was a burning smell and then it shot up to really fast. I had to do an emergency stop. I still had a mile to go so I tried again, despite the smell, and it soon slowed down to a stop. It was dead.

We unplugged it and my boyfriend took it apart to discover nothing. We don't know how to fix it.

So much for my free treadmill. I guess I will have to brave my runner's agoraphobia and run in the outside world now. Did it really have to break right when the weather got hot?

That's what I get for picking up treadmills.

I have learned my lesson and will never do it again...unless it is just irresistibly pretty...or free.